A few months ago, I began embarking on a journey to become a Pilates Instructor. From day 1 - I loved it! I felt renewed, fresh, calm, balanced and excited at the prospect of being able to develop my skills, knowledge and body at something 'new and shiny'. I had found a passion.
Initially I had decided to sign up for the 6 month long Reformer Instructor course, to give myself an extra source of income on the side-lines of my full time teaching job, as well as to complement my enjoyment of running and prevent the array of injuries that seem to be happening more regularly as I become older (I never actually believed my parents say that when they blamed old age for needing more time to rest to heal, thinking that it was their excuse to have some 'R & R' while the three energetic and bouncing kids played on the slide and cubby house outside for hours!!).
Yes - suddenly we realize that we do actually have to look after your bodies and our minds to be able to deal with the many day today tasks that life throws at us.
From the initial course, I found myself researching for hours, the various training courses and qualifications around Melbourne needed in my quest to become a better qualified instructor.
I met with (and dragged my very patient boyfriend along!) several franchise companies - perhaps I could set up and manage a studio? I emailed and phoned several well known Pilates instructors around town, to try and determine what was needed to become a well equipped, and eventually highly sought after Instructor. I bounced ideas and vented my frustrations with my Parents, friends and again my (by this point, EXTREMELY patient) boyfriend. I spent every spare moment at home, at work, between coffee dates and while waiting for appointments researching and running ideas through my brain - trying to figure out A) What I needed to do to get where I want to, B) Where exactly I wanted to be in the near and far future, and C) How in the world was I going to be able to get the time to do this whilst working full time??!!
Eventually I decided on a course, and have held off on setting up my own studio until I am better prepared - but it is amazing how much your own thoughts can almost sabotage your life, your relaxation, your ability to rest, your desire to enjoy the simple things and your own want to do anything else apart from Pilates, Pilates, Pilates!!!
I still very much love Pilates, and preach it's amazing benefits to everyone I speak to - but it was time to star letting my mind appreciate what is around me - instead of focusing so much on what I didn't have or what I had to add 'A.S.A.P'!!
My body was starting to scream at me; I wasn't enjoying the running or reformer classes like I used to. My mind was hurling negative thoughts from every direction; I was coming home in tears and stressed about things that really didn't matter. I wasn't enjoying the things that got me to this point in the first place!!!
Thank goodness - my Superhero boyfriend and wise old parents told me one thing. You need to allow yourself a break to enjoy the great life you already have! Sounds simple. At first, I didn't want to let myself take a step back thinking that I needed every spare second of time to dedicate to the 'idea' that I want to become. I thought to get better, I need to donate everything into getting there. This thought process got me to the point where my body was aching, my run times were slowing and my passion was beginning to wilt, like a week old rose.
I can happily and confidently say that after a week of including meditation, yoga, time to read my book, dropping back on a couple of days of running/pilates and actually going out on the weekend for a few drinks and social catch ups - has completely lifted my spirits.
I felt myself smiling after too many scooters, pilates hundreds and standing leg adduction exercises for a Sunday morning. I noticed the federation style houses, pot holes, newly landscaped gardens of the streets I ran through yesterday. I was reminded how refreshing a cold beer and glass of champagne can be with friends.
I was back! Life certainly isn't as difficult as my mind had me believe a couple of weeks ago. In realistic terms - Pilates and the opportunity to open my own studio will still be there waiting for me after I have a couple of weeks to process exactly what it is that I wanted to do.
Meanwhile - I am enjoying snuggling up on the couch after a delicious brunch, a cheeky couple of organic cakes, watching the footy and excited to begin a new week (hmm - not to say that Monday-itis won't hit tomorrow!!) of new moments, challenges and journeys...and yes embarking on my Instructor journey in a way that I can enjoy it, not resent it!!
Life is too short to get caught up in thinking too far ahead. Enjoy what you have, and enjoy the journey to your destination; wines, coffees, friends, blue skies and time doing nothing at all :-)
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