Wednesday 27 November 2013

The older the better... :-)

Its funny to think back to when you were in your early teenage years how you had a vision of yourself being married, settling down with bouncing & bubble kids, living in your own house and having a dream job by the time you hit you mid-late twenties.....
But hitting it is a completely different story. I'm sure I still have a regular fifteen year old that takes ownership of my body and giggles like a school girl about silly things, or is happy not taking on board 'the serious life', in the knowledge that it is just so much more fun to go through life with a big grin and sense of humour at every situation thrown at you.

What I do think though is that responsibility and age tend to inescapably go hand in hand. I think I actually enjoy getting older!

Here are some reasons why:
- You know so much more! Through experiences we gain knowledge, which is far different to that we read in a text book or we learn from school. If I knew the things I did back when I was eighteen, I would be one wise woman 'kicking some serious butt' in the world of youth!

- You know what you want out of life. The amount of different pathways and ideas I have tried to walk down and follow has most definitely given me the knowledge of knowing exactly what I want to do with my life, and where I want to be by the end of it. Through trial and error, we become more equipped, just as an infant learns their skills from environmental and social feedback, to know the things we hope to achieve, the things we dream about doing and the things that get us up each day to try and get us there!

- You realise that there is much more to life than being 'the popular kid', being drop dead gorgeous, earning the most money, owning the best possessions and being 'famous'. You realise that without happiness, love and health - life's most simple, but supremely satisfying pleasures, you don't have a lot. If you manage to get all of the popularity, looks, money and social status 'boxes checked', none of it means anything if you are not satisfied and happy with life. If you wake up depressed an anxious each day from long work hours, a lack of time to enjoy life at a leisurely pace - or god forbid - having no time to have coffee and wine dates with the girls - is it all really worth it!?

- You gain self confidence and are better able to accept you for who you are. It doesn't matter what life throws you, with life, age and experience, you know that this is one, sometimes horrific event, but there is always tomorrow, and this is just working to make me a stronger person. At one stage - I would of used to lock myself in my bedroom, sobbing endless tears into my pillow at the news of a friend disagreeing with something I said, or not quite getting the promotion I was hoping for....even having a boy (and yes, it still isn't a nice feeling!!) kiss another girl when you really wanted to be his New Years 'pash'!! But now I know that everything DOES happen for a reason, and every decision we make or event we go through is only a small part of the life we still have to live.

- We start to get some awesome curves, and somehow seem to manage developing better muscles than when we were younger!! Finally - some shape and voluptuousness to our girly figures!! Yes it feels like we have to work a little harder as we get older to get the desired effects of fitness, but once we get there, I'm certain it looks so much sexier than in our younger years!!!

- We appreciate what's really important in life. As we get older, we take the time to smell the roses, we cherish those friends that have been there for us through great times and bad, and we know when we find a partner who is worth being with for a very long time - appreciating conversation and sharing experiences together!....Did I mention we know where to find a delicious wine or gourmet antipasto plate??!! :-P

These points are only the starting point to a million different things that happen naturally, with age. So next time you wake up freaking out about wrinkles or your first grey hair, just think about the awesome things you have done, and are still to do in your life - and how much better they will be now that you are mature enough to take every breathe of it in!
Life is still vibrant and exciting in my books!!

Xxx

Saturday 23 November 2013

The power of a compliment... :-)

So how often in the last week have you paid a compliment to a friend, work colleague, family member or even a 'passer by'?? Yes - we're all guilty of being so caught up in the pace of our own lives, that sometimes we forget how important and effective it is to provide compliments to one another.

The other day after coming home from a really long day...the lady living in the apartment above mine, who I had never met before, said "You look great lately - you must be a personal Trainer?". With a giggle similar to that of a nervous school girl, I grinned with a great big 'Thanks lovely!'. I guess often she happens to walk past my window on her way to work, to be greeted by me sweating it out on my bike (clearly my most graceful moments!), doing some quick weights or yoga stretches - but hey, a compliment is a compliment and it definitely made my day!!
Here are some great reasons to share in a few compliments today -

**It takes the focus off of you.
Any time you can break the habit of negative thought processes even just for a second, you’re shifting your attention from all the things going wrong in your day and putting it on helping make someone else’s day a little sunnier. Before long, your compliment to a complete stranger could go viral, and strangers everywhere will be smiling at each other, telling the person they just passed on the street something they like about them. Yes, this is indeed a game changer for everyone.
 
 **Smiling burns calories.
 And smiling often leads to laughing, and laughing burns even more calories.
 
**Compliments spark creativity.
Finding something positive to say to someone at least once a day has to the power to remove, say, that person’s mental block around a big project they’ve been struggling with and clear the pathways for them to get to the solution.  While something this drastic might not happen to each person who receives a compliment from you, you will undoubtedly create a space for them to think differently from that moment on. Small acts of kindness go a long way these days.
 
**Kindness doesn’t actually kill.
We’ve all heard the phrase “kill them with kindness.” Well, if the fear of killing someone with kindness has prevented you from complimenting a person, I hereby release you from said fear. Kindness could quite possibly kill a bad mood or a bad memory, but it WILL NOT kill you or the person on the other end of the kindness. Don’t believe me? Try it! Be nice to someone right now and see what happens.
 
**Sincere compliments build trust.
 Each one of us walking this planet has the desire to be acknowledged. When someone else notices even the slightest thing about another person, it can shout to that person, “Hey!  Someone noticed me!!” Your daily compliments to “the shy one” at work whose name no one knows can help her break out of her shyness and, who knows? turn her into the best friend you’ve ever had. We all need someone in our lives we can trust, and the more we build up others the more we’re also building up ourselves.
**What goes around comes around.
When you give a compliment, you’re more than likely going to get one in return. When someone notices you, you’ll feel special even if it’s just for a moment. That moment could be enough to carry you the rest of the day and keep you happy and productive. Your boss might notice the change in your attitude and give you the raise that’s been coming to you for the last two years. You’ll be happier, your co-workers will be happier and pretty soon the whole office building is happy. And yet again we have things going and coming around.
 
**Compliments are F.R.E.E.!
 
So from something as simple as a smile, to a friendly comment about what your friend is wearing, to something more deep and sincere such as how a friend as such a great friend. each is just as important and needed as the next.
Just think of it as your good deed for the day - at least one compliment released EVERY day Gorgeous Girl! And do not forget - if you're lucky enough to receive one, accept it with a great big smile!
Xx
 

Friday 15 November 2013

How exercise starts a cycle of 'awesomeness' in your life.... :-)

WE all know that exercise is great for us - not only for our health, mind and body, but it also seems to magically set a natural 'healthy cycle' up for us without us even realising!

As I was out riding through the beautiful country side, green open hills and crisp morning air this morning - I started the think about all of the things than seem to transpire by themselves as exercise becomes part of our daily routine.

1) Have you ever noticed that you often eat a wider variety and more nutritious foods and drinks? I think subconsciously, our body knows that without giving it the fuel it requires to keep up our exercise routines, we often feel more lethargic, grumpy and un-motivated. It also knows that skipping meals and trying to replace them with a strong coffee will not work in giving you slow released energy or helping your metabolism!!

2) Your alcohol intake seems to be cut down (well...maybe not completely...yes, unfortunately red wine and an ice cold beer on a summers afternoon hits the spot no matter how much exercise I do!!!!), from over-indulging every Friday and/or Saturday night (or perhaps mid-week for those that get a little excited!!) to the point of a hangover to a simple couple of glasses at the most; just to 'hit the spot' relatively speaking. I suppose knowing that you won't be able to enjoy and get that 'kick' out of your workout the next day if you can't even contemplate opening up the curtains or waking up before midday!

3) You tend to get more accomplished each day. I always remember our school Principal telling us the "the people who are most busy, are the most organised, and tend to get the most out of their day". That saying - I believe is true! If I keep myself busy, running errands, doing odd jobs, working, socialising, and of course- exercising, I find that my days naturally become a lot more satisfying and I achieve a lot more in a few hours than what I would if I over-procrastinate, sleep in and stop - start my way through the day. If I set my alarm for the morning to exercise, I suddenly become much more energies and ready to complete as many tasks in a day as I can think of!!

4) Your energy levels are heightened for hours after exercising. I have found that not exercising for 2 or more days in a  row, I often become lazy and develop a sever lack of motivation to achieve anything! Perhaps it is the endorphins released with a the completion of a 'sweat session', or even just the feeling of having completed a 'challenge'/task - my energy levels are always higher and my head is much more clear if I do get moving!!

5) You tend to be able to deal with life's challenges with a lot more realism and calmness than if you keep getting ready to start exercising consistently 'next week'! I have over-come and 'dug myself out' of many down times, negative thoughts, or unwanted life events by making sure I do some sort of activity to get my blood flowing. Even something as small as a 20-30minute walk can help to keep you going, take your negative thoughts away from whatever is weighing you down , and come away with a much clearer picture of the issue and your 'plan of attack'. Its amazing how some fresh air and oxygen can take an "Oh my god, I can't deal with this!" moment to an "Ok - so this has happened, but this is how I'm going to deal with it" moment!

6) You sleep better. If you're tired and have used your muscles and your mind during the day - you will sleep much better and remain asleep for much of the night. You will find that you don't wake up restless at 3am, struggling to get back to sleep, but rather dream the night away without your legs feeling hot, bothered and agitated!!

So - what are you waiting for? There is plenty of merit in getting yourself into a lifelong routine of exercising at least 5 days a week for a minimum of thirty minutes (as Government recommendations state!). The natural cycle of feeling amazing, energised, and goal oriented somehow becomes uncovered and enters your life with a 'bang'!!
Go on - it's addictive!!!!

Xxx

Saturday 9 November 2013

When the 'Quarter life crisis' hits.....it can hit hard!! X

Since I was little, I remember the saying "If you do a job, do it greatly or don't do it at all" resonating in my mind from my parents. A great saying for most - although combined with my perfectionist and goal driven personality, I feel as if I seem to of all of a sudden hit a 'crisis point'; perhaps the newly emerging 'quarter life crisis'.
For years, I've always made sure I did well at school, I worked to my full potential, I always worked hard to please others (be it friends, family, the workplace, the sporting field...), I started to climb my way up the career ladder and once I reached a long term goal - I aimed for something even bigger.

Of course - I came to hit a few very large hurdles along the way; my biggest being a severe bout of mental health issues; depression, anxiety and an eating disorder. All of which I have definitely learnt a lot from (and of course, has become a goal of mine to make sure each of you do not follow down that same dark and un-memorable path!). Much research suggests that a perfectionist or 'Type A' personality person tends to be at higher risk of developing these horrible illness', which seem to stem from doing everything so perfectly that you start to feel unfulfilled and out of control.

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Recently - I feel as if my life has come to a stand still. I have achieved a lot that I am proud of and experienced many amazing memories of which many people may never get to experience. For those - I am very proud and content about. However, I feel that after all the direction, goals, commitment, sacrifices, differing priorities to many of my friends and craving for achievement and recognition; I have somehow missed perhaps the biggest and most important pieces of my life puzzle.
For so long - my life has been about making my mark on the world - which I still want to do!!!
I am now 28, pushing the age of when my friends and much of society are getting married, starting families (yes - unfortunately a woman's biological clock is ticking if we want to ensure our offspring are born healthy and without birth defects - yet another thing that men can get away with.....surely periods and having to carry/give birth to a child the size of a water melon is bad enough!!), and feel as if I don't actually have the things that complete me or make me want to bounce out of bed with excitement and a sense of feeling needed.

Of course - I have some brilliant friends, and I do love a great coffee or brunch catch up with the girls, but it suddenly dawned on me - am I ever going to have a life companion and be able to start the family I always imagined I would have before I am 30!!?? When the weekend comes, and your friends are all busy with their own families or partner, it is quite daunting to think that somewhere along the lines, you may have missed your chance to have the same thing?
I feel as if I have pushed people away for so long in my quest to achieve my goals or daily tasks, that I have forgotten how to trust, love and be 'flexible' or spontaneous with people.

undefinedI have had a go at 'life', travelled the world, bought (and sold) a house, purchased a new car, reached higher levels within the workplace, trained for and competed in various distance sporting events, bungee jumped, sky-dived, skinny - dipped.......but now - despite a list of great memories and achievements, I still feel in-complete and 'lost'. Being independent has always been fine for me; as I was so buried in work, training and 'achieving', until now.
I think I am at a point where I need someone to just 'be there'.

According to http://thefuckitlife.com/, a humorous look at just saying "F**k it" to the world and all the 'supposed problems' we are supposed to come across, sometimes all you need to look at is what you have, how you feel and if it doesn't bother you to do what you actually want to do, then do it!! Who cares what the world thinks!!

The problems with the 'pre- thirty years'!!! Maybe it's just easier to pack up and travel the world again!!

Xxx

Wednesday 6 November 2013

Life on track after travel...... :-)

Although it's been five months since I have returned from my overseas adventure, I didn't realise the effect that it would have on my life so far on.
Of course, the sight-seeing, the friendships made, the once in a life-time experiences and the immersion amongst many different cultures was amazing, and something I would recommend to everyone!! However, the process of getting back into a routine with consistent full time work, as well as having an over-sized handful of epiphanies about new career paths or new business ventures has been more difficult than I first envisaged.
Over the past few months, I have questioned myself, my interests, my desires, my goals, my strengths, weakness' as well as challenging myself to step outside of my usual normal routine to step into a 'new life'. And yes - this can be an enriching learning curve, one of which has ultimately pointed us  on the right direction.
However, at the same time, and I'm sure for many 'post-travellers' they feel the same - a sense of being lost in a big world where routine, connectedness and purpose are the centre-pieces for an adult life.

The first few weeks apon arriving home from overseas, I think I caught up with more people than I had seen even before I went away. It made me appreciate the friendships I did have and want to re-kindle those long-lost soul mates who made us all who we are today. You are the happiest you have been in months! However, after all the fun and fanfare resides - you realise that everyone falls back into their own lives while you are left with no job or sense of direction!!

So how can we get ourselves 'going' and start to set things up again to live that life we dreamt about, to have that second chance to start again and try something new?

- One of the first things is to set yourself up in a routine. I felt, (and still feel!) more lost when I had no real purpose, no set time to wake up or go to sleep, no real jobs to do each day. So, choose a time to set your alarm to each morning - get up, go for a run, hit the gym or have a refreshing summer early morning swim. It's funny how a simple act of routine or an accomplishment can change the outlook of your day!
- Brainstorm your interests, your strengths, your weakness' and come up with a list of traits which make you who you are. Use these traits to research possible career paths (or if you're really keen - decide which kind of small business that inner entrepreneur wants to 'dabble in'!).

- Seek the help and support of friends and family to remind you that you are not lost at all. They will always be here, you have a million amazing things about you that were there before you left for overseas. Believe it or not, they are still there and will continue to be there for the rest of your life. You are who you are; every brilliant piece!!

-  Expect to have some 'bad' days where you are not feeling your best. But also remember, that those bad days are ALWAYS followed by some great days! I cannot count the amount of times that has happened to me. It's a great comfort to know that there are always positive days to take you away from focussing on the negative. Life works in funny ways!

- Use the spare time to try out a few different casual jobs to see what does interest you. It's a great time to not feel the pressure of having to stay with a job you like - and be able to leave whenever you change your mind about what exactly it is you ant to do. It doesn't mean you will be working in short term , casual roles for the rest of your life - but rather using the near future to get a feel for the types of industry that interest you.

undefined- One thing you do learn about being overseas, is that yes - you do only live once. Make a point each week to do something 'different' and daring the keep that level of excitement still alive! Make a trip down to the beach, plan a bush hike with a group of friends, go an see that concert you've always wanted to see, organise that Mexican dinner and drinks night. Keep giving yourself things to keep you going and feeding on life, and to stop you focussing on getting back to 'the daily grind' as quick as you can.

At the end of the day - you will end up being where you want to be, doing the things you want to do. Those first few months home are always the hardest and it does take some strength to keep you pointing in a positive direction, or even remaining in a positive mindset! But you will get back to having 'your awesome life' back, which is often more awesome than it was before because you've travelled and grown as a person who has so many life-long memories and experiences locked away forever!

Round two of life - here you come!!!